I feel like crying now... emotion breakdown... Y am i so dumb... i'm alwiz in the toilet bowl... covered wif shit...

Have a laff 1st

This is not the 1st time this type of song is being broadcast in this show... Though i'm kind of used to it but i still laff out... Haha

Ahhh.... Its November le... So fast the yr is going to finish... This month is alwiz the month where Kajuaz will have the " Holiday Mood " feel... Really feels like the schooling time and waiting for this thing to come... Wheeeee..... I'm gonna get this feeling back again le... Real one wor... Gonna have holiday next week le... Cant wait for it to happen... Gotta start planning how to spend my holiday... Oh yah... I can wait for the love letter to come... Been waiting for it for a months le... opening the letterbox everyday... But no love letter... So Sad... Haizzz... Watever lah... Have or dun have is predestined one... I wun force... I still believe tat all will goes well when time is ripe...

So Desu Ka

These are some little words i collected...

" U dun have gf meh? But i see ur frendster so many char bor leh... "
( Give mi a break man... I muz be a dumbass to put those pics up if i had a gf rite? I'm asking for trouble... )

" U watch Sex And The City one ah... Muz be looking for their sex scene rite? "
( I think watching xXx can satisfy mi more)

" U this kind noe how to appreciate art one meh? I tot only high class ppl noe how to appreciate it.. "
( It takes a mind to appreciate, not class )

" I wun intro female frends to u... They will be dirtied by u... "
( Oh!! So now i'm the top nodge rapist in Singapore le )

" Go out wif char bor rite??? Which ger so unfortunate??? "
( Guess i'm listed in the top 10 wanted person by the police already )

" Wah!! U read books one ah?? "
( I admit tat english books does makes mi sleep, but chinese dun )

So now i noe tat in ur eyes i'm such a lousy, low class, perverted piece of shit... Give mi a break lah... I'm single doesn't mean anything ok... I'm happily leading my single life...

Retaliation




Dun force a tame dog to dead end... Even the meetest lamb will bite back...

Btw, this is a short teaser from the movie S11

Well Done





I give 2 thumbs up for those comments... But i give 2 toes and 2 thumbs up for such a democratic lecturer... Really wonderful... Here is the link

Thick Skin

Watched the Superstar 2 audition... Fucked up... Y Singaporeans so thick skin one ah... U noe u cant sing then y the hell u still go for the audition to waste other ppl time... Have some consideration can??? I really wonder wat is in the mind of those ppl, are u dumb or wat... Having a big pile of shit in ur head??? And some even dare to doubt the judges... Wat the fuck... If u cant means u cant, so fuck off... Dun make a clown out of urself... Especially the stupid auntie tat goes back for the 2nd time... I'm sure u all noe which stupid auntie i toking bout lah... Seeing her is worst than wat the fuck lor... She thinks its funny??? I think she need to go IMH for a mind check... If i get to see her on the streets 1 day i'll scold her FUCK lor... Crazy ass...Go do something more meaningful lah, dun make a fool out of urself... I'm totally pissed and dissed bout this Superstar thingy le... I'm not going to watch it anymore... Very disappointed seeing a blind get champion in the last season... Not tat i discrmination disabled ppl, its juz tat he really cant sing well and there's nothing much he can do except play guitar and sing... Wat else??? Full of shit... And finding a star using audience sms... Fuck lah... Lidat might as well no need those judges... Need the judges for fuck??? Juz a puppet giving comments??? Ur comments doesn't affect the votes anyway... If the contestant got some filthy $$$ they can pay frends to sms for them wat... Fuck Project Superstar 2!!! Juz a money earning gimmick show...

Refreshed

Aroma therapy really does help a little... I bought a air purifier... And 3 bottles of essence oil... Having nice smell in my room now... My mood is more light nowadays also... Ahhhhh.... Feels so good...

And still there's ppl asking mi whether i'm in love... AAARRRGGGHHH... Lazy to ans them also... I noe myself very clearly wat i am and wat i'm doing... Anyway its not a close frend also... Untill now i think only 1 person understand wat Kissing Affectionately Justify Unity And Zeal means... Sad case... Nobody actually reads mi mind... they only see mi on the surface wif shallow thoughts...

WOW

Got this pic juz now... wow... this was taken in 1999... Wooooo... look at the cute little Kajuaz... Haha... Observing it... Tat time i was in NCC and got to wear this uniform already... And i stole ppl badges to wear... Neh... Tat one in the red circle... Its the airborne badge...



Never did know tat yrs later i actually earn the badge also... Genuine one... Haha...

For Kissing Affectionately Justify Unity And Zeal

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Sux!!!

Ah.... tot i have solve the fucking problem of blogging in chinese character... damn... Still not solve... watever lah... dun have also can type in english wat... PUI!!!

Came back from east coast for a day of bladding... And decided to get myself a pair of blades... Since i have a grp of kakis tat will meet up on sat to blade and they all had their blades... so i guess this amt of money is worth it...

Yah and i had a bad fall today... haha... got my left knee a big patch of wound... never did i tot i will fall... was trying out new stunts but fail... shit... wat the hell... juz gotta be careful more...

Kajuaz is feeling so lonely these few weeks except for the working hrs and sat at east coast... Guess when i'm alone i really will start thinking wild... I seriously needs companionship... else i'll die...

And many ppl ask if i had a gf recently... I said no... Then they ponder bout my new nick on msn... Kissing Affectionately Justify Unity And Zeal... I smiled... Any smart aleck can understand wat this short phrase means??? Tag mi to tell mi the ans... Lets see who is the one who understand mi...

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???????????? So happy... Save mi so much trouble... Juz being lucky to steal the HTML code from a frends source... Took 5 mins to study those fucking long and messy code... made a smart guess and wahhllah... (-_-)

A blissful song

Actually i got alot to blog... but juz dunno where to start... and not in the rite mood to type also... so..............................................

TIME TO DESTRESS!!! HAVE SOME LAUGHTER

WOW... How many % true???

I did this online astrology test on personality... This is wat it say....


Life Path 7 (7, 16/7, 25/7, 34/7)
The Life Path 7 suggests that you entered this plane with a gift for investigation, analysis, and keen observation. You are a thinker of the first order. You evaluate situations very quickly, and with amazing accuracy. As a result, you are thorough and complete in your work, the perfectionist who expects everyone else to meet a high standard of performance, too.
A Life Path 7 person is a peaceful and affectionate soul. But you guard your connection to people carefully. It's easy for you to detect deception and recognize insincere people, and you avoid them. You aren't one to have a wide circle of friends, but once you accept someone as a friend, it's for life. It's as if you must get to know someone a lot better before you allow the wall surrounding you to be penetrated. Chances are you are a very charming and refined individual with great poise and a quick wit. Nonetheless, there is an exclusiveness about you. You probably aren't a very social person. Your reserve is often taken to be aloofness, but actually, it's not that at all. It is merely a cover up for your basic feeling of insecurity. There's no rush, It takes time for you to warm up to new friends. Clubs and organizations hold little interest for you; you are not a joiner.
You actually like being alone and away from the hustle and bustle of modern life. In many ways, you would have fit in better in much earlier times when the pace of life was less hectic. You need a good deal of quiet time to be with your own inner thoughts and dreams. You dislike crowds, noise, distractions, and confusion.
The overwhelming strength of the number 7 is reflected in the depth of thinking that is shown; you will garner knowledge from practically every source that you find. Intellectual, scientific, and studious, you don't accept a premise until you have dissected the subject and arrived at your own independent conclusion.
This is a very spiritual number and it often denotes a sort of spiritual wisdom that becomes apparent at a fairly early age. A built in inner guide providing a strong sense of intuition may set you up as being a law unto yourself. Whatever spiritual position you take, whether traditional or bizarre, you will cling to it with fervor. Once you have decided an issue, it is almost impossible to get you to revisit the question. Adaptability is not your style, and change for you is a rarity.
You rely heavily on your experiences and your intuition, rather than accepting advice from someone. Your hunches usually prove to be very accurate, and knowing this, you follow the directions they seem to guide.
In the most negative use of the 7 energies, you can become very pessimistic, lackadaisical, quarrelsome, and secretive. A Life Path 7 individual who is not living life fully and gaining through experiences, is a hard person to live with because of a serious lack of consideration for others. There is such a negative attitude. Indeed, operating on the negative side of the 7 can produce a very selfish and spoiled individual and living with one can be a challenge. This may be why some 7s actually prefer living alone. If you have any of the negative traits they are very difficult to get rid of because you tend to feel that the world really does owe you a living or that in some way you are not being fairly treated.
Fortunately, the negative 7 is not the typical 7, at least not without some mitigating positive traits. This number is one that seems to have some major shifts from highs to lows. Stability in feelings may be elusive for you.

Tell mi how true is this about mi in my shoutbox...

FEAR

Oh my... This is terrible... seeing more frends getting married... am not worried bout the wedding dinner red packets... is juz tat seeing frends around getting married is really fearful... When will be ur turn?? Tats the fucking question u dun wanna think and ans... its so embarassing but indeed have to think bout this question... seriously i really cant forsee myself having tat day... its juz so far away... so far tat its not even being tot of... DAMN...

Maybe to really start looking towards this goal, i gotta get myself shit ass attached 1st lah... oh god pls send a girlfrend to mi... a true blue one... not those LV Prada, Sassy, Bitchy, Horny and Dead ones... So picky of mi... guess god will juz show mi his middle finger and say go fucking find urself lah!!! Yah... True... I'll go find myself a fuck... haha... ('',)

World Most Destructive Weapon

No!!! Its not the Atomic Bomb nor Anthrax... Its human... Whoever or watever created human is destroying the world... Humans is now the most destructive weapon on earth... Coz we are getting smarter and smarter... Creating more new things to destroy the world... To think tat suicide bomber is already the extreme thing a human can do... There actually 1 more thing tat is more extreme than suicide bomber... Which every human is capable of doing... Its even more inhumane than suicide bomber .............................................

IGNORING & NEGLECTING... This the ultimate weapon used by humans every now and then... The power of it is even more suffering than dying... Capable of making ppl dun wan to die yet feel like dying & make ppl do ultimate things which include self destruction... Who can destroy this horrigible weapon which everyone is capable of using???

BDSM

For those who dunno wat BDSM means, its Bondage, Domination, Sadism, Machoism...

Nah... i'm not toking bout this topic... I'm juz gonna say bout Domination... Looking us people in our life now... we are totally dominated by technology today... How many actually can live without HP & PC??? Our everday life will include these 2 little but very dominating fellow here... It in fact became part of human life now... I really wonder how the people live thru in the olden days where these 2 fellow doesn't exist??? Even small children... yes i mean small children in pri 1... they even noe wat bluetooth is... they noe how to surf net & send email... Wat the fuck!!! I think i'm still sucking thumb when i'm in pri 1... Well juz gotta blame it tat i'm born in the 19th century; the last of the Old Era... Now is start of the New X Era...

I'm gonna try to experience the feeling of 1 week without HP & PC... Hmmmm... Is it too long... I'm afraid i cant take it... Shit man... How am i gonna make it...

Kiss Of Death

Wat does a kiss signifies??? When 2 person kiss, wat is the msg within??? Does it means I Love You?? Does it means We Are Together??? Or does it means I Wanna Taste Ur Saliva???

Reed Wat U Sow

Been in the test for a while... Passed my PSLE and now am in the O'level... results will be out this week... Am real excited bout it but at the same time worries suface too... Kind of surprise tat i actually can last so long... its not tat easy... especially flu period... Its so unbearable... Well its already up to this stage now... guess i'm learning to get used to it le...

A Short Story For You

A man went to pray to god and made a wish, "Oh god, pls let mi strike lottery."
God replied :" Ok, i will help u."
The 2nd day the man went back to find god, "Oh god, pls let mi strike lottery."
God replied :" Ok, i will help u."
The 3rd day the man went back to find god again, "Oh god, pls met mi strike lottery."
God was angry, " How the Fuck am i suppose to help u when u didn't even buy a lottery ticket?!"

Iced...

I'm frozen... Been in the freezer for 2 days le... Totally lost inside... Cold, hunger, selfless, hopeless and dunno where to find the exit... Its totally sealed up... No outside air able to penetrate thru it... I guess i'll juz stay inside for a few more days ba... I'm still clinging on to the hope tat a fire will melt down all the ice...

This will gonna be my next art movie... No matter wat i'll go watch it... and YOU... yes i mean YOU... YOU are gonna acc mi to catch this movie together... YOU reading my blog... YOU noe who YOU are... YOU missed S11 wif mi... so now YOU no matter wat YOU muz watch this wif mi... YOU have many dates to choose... 23th - 26th & 30th - 2nd... YOU better choose a date asap... Its showing at The Art House... YOU are going to sms mi when YOU see this.... Visit Smell Of Rain & The Art House

Test Of Valour

I'm going thru this... A simply very difficult task for mi to take... A test tat will make my mind goes wild... I'm not sure whether i can make it thru this... But I'll try and try... I'll overcome all the obstacles and mind test each time... Its not easy to have such test everytime... I consider myself lucky to have this test going thru mi... If i pass this test i'm gonna gain lots of experience points and level up many level... And i'm a better person from then on...

Bird Flu

I didnt caught the H5N1 virus... Instead i caught the specially mutated virus created juz for mi... The H5C5 virus... Courtesy of Miss Hot5 & Cold5... There is no cure for this special virus yet... But i'm gonna find this cure myself...

This is a really fucking nice movie... A great show... I totally enjoyed the whole session... I'll give 2 thumbs & 2 toes up for it... Money worth spending... Although the film quality isn't tat good but the filming style is damn good... I dunno how to describe it lah... juz damn good lor...

The whole show is full of coarse language... All the fucking,KNN,CB,LJ everything come out... Its really shows out a true blue Singaporean life... Everything transparent... But its a pity tat there isn't much publicity on this and it only have 5 shows in total... I wuld recommend frends to go watch this show coz it really can help u forget ur stress... But too bad... last show at tonite.... Sobs...

I gonna watch this show later... dunno whether its gonna be good anot... but the 1st impression it gave mi makes mi wanna watch it... It shld be a typical singaporean show... I like singaporean show coz its so true and uniquely singapore... Its something others cant impersonate one... All the KNN, CCB, LJ etc... this is singapore...

Actually wanna go watch the Fireworks Festival one... but when i found out the this show only got 5 screening... i rather forsake the firworks show...

Balding

Realise tat nowadays when i wash my hair theres a increase amount of fallen hair grabbed in my hands... a really great difference from last time... will i face balding situation???

Thinner

Got a few ppl say tat i look thinner le... I wonder y??? Recently i've been eating more than usual which is 3 meals... B4 tat i was eating 1 meal per day... So does it mean tat the more u eat the thinner u get??? Shld i be happy when i hear tat??? coz i'm quite worried... i've been eating more, no work stress, how come will get thinner leh... worried tat my body is haywire... my body is sick... i dunno... i scared...

No blog... dun feel like blogging... too much fuck shit happened over the weekend till today... anyway already forgot some of the happenings and dun wish to remember them by blogging them down...

Tired

I'm tried... juz plain tried... tried mainly on my body and some on my mind... see... i'm tried till i type the word rongly... wat the hell...

Sleepless nite

Oh i did not sleep well last nite... dunno y suddenly i feel so lonely instead of horny... for the 1st time the lonely virus struck and hit mi hard... usually i can overcome it myself... but last nite the feeling was so strong... one tat i cant defence myself from it...

Forgive & Forget

I found out tat forgiving someone is such an easy task compared to forgetting... Forgiving someone needs time but forgetting wat someone did to u needs a hard knock on the head... ( to lose memory)

Understanding Kajuaz

How many understand Little Kajuaz??? Kajuaz have 3 female buddies, 1 male buddy... Pathetic ah... I dun think so... having so little is better than having alot alot of aquaintances which dun even give a damn shit bout u... When u are in trouble they juz leave u in lurch...

So out of my buddies, who can understand mi and deserve my care and concern in return??? Seriously there is only 1 female and the male... Y only 50% ??? I glad its 50% only... juz a nice no. not too little not too much... Then how bout the other 2 female ones??? Nah!!!... they dun deserve my care and concern... maybe u think i'm bit of too much to say this coz i claim tat they are my buddy... ya true they are my buddy... but they will only find mi when they are in trouble... I have reasons to say this... they dun sincerely care bout wats going on in my life, wat they really care bout is their bf... this is kind of sensitive here... how does it affect mi... It defineately affect mi coz i've been hurt by them b4 becoz of their bf... i'm like a piece of turd... Fuck... i csnt carry on writing... damn pissed off when come to think of it...

Juz a comment

I got a little comment from an uncle while working on his computer... It goes like this :

Uncle: Young man! Are u ok??

Me: Yah...

Uncle: Are u into Opera or Drama??? U painted ur nails...

Me: No... I'm not into tat...

Uncle: Do u have a girlfriend anot???

Me: No... But i'm straight...

Uncle: U cannot do this u noe... All the gers will be jealous of u becoz u got nicer nails than them...

Me: (-_-)lll

Ok I do smile back at him lah... well he put his sacarcism in a nice way lah... Listen only to the good things... haha... Anyway I've removed the polish already... Reason??? Not becoz of comments I cant take... But its becoz 7th mth is next week... I dun wanna get attention from the HUMANS & NON - HUMANS... Looking at the chinese calendar... I gotta wait till Sept 25th b4 I can repolish my nails again... dunno I still can see my nails anot... If I do means its so damn long... If I dun either means it breaks or I go back to reservice...

Black or White???

Which is nicer?? Black or White... Haha... now then i realise white is so diff to paint... i painted 4 layer of white b4 i can actually make my nails opaque white...



PS. Stupid Eve suggest tat i paint 1 black 1 white...

Oh my fucking god!!! God damn it!!!

Went to the wall to press $$$ this morning.... inserted my card, juz when i wanted to key in my PIN... WAT THE FUCK!!! Its not my name showing on the welcome screen... It shows Tan Heng Chong... I blurred for few secs... cancel the transaction to retrieve my card to check... FUCK~!!!... Its really not mine card... How the hell did this card fall into my hand... Back track my memories... my last transaction is in Xchange Room... Great!!!... Blur Waitresses...

No choice gotta call the customer service to report this stupid case... Luckily i no need to pay for the replacement card and tat person did not find out bout this also... he did not use my card... BUT unfortunately i dun have cash wif mi... shit... cant even buy cigarettes... feels so naked and hadicap without my card around... no cash and cant even get cash... PIECE OF SHIT... now gotta wait for few days to have the replacement sent to mi...

Bought this book... really attracts mi when i 1st glimpse at the cover... haven started reading it yet... but i noe i will finish this book... actually i'm also quite interested in his life... i wanna noe more bout him...

I wanna watch this movie... i love horror movie... especially when it can let mi have a chill down my spine... but till now only 'The Eye' done it to mi b4... reviews heard is not really nice... was scary in the 1st part but had a touching ending at the end... spoiler for a horror movie...

Here's the 2nd movie on my list... Dun really noe wat is it bout but its catches my attention when the trailer was broadcast at the big screen Shaw Lido... was walking pass there and i stopped to watch it... shld be interesting... bit of art, feelings... i gonna watch it no matter wat... i juz cant find kaki to watch wif mi...

WOOHOO

Look at this piece of beautiful art man... woohoo...

Do not doubt... this is little Kajuaz's hand... and the nails ain't fake... they are absoufuckinglutely nails tat grow out from my fingers... If u feel disgusted... pls leave and head to the toilet bowl, plant ur head in there and fucking puke ur intestine out... I dun give a fucking damn of wat ppl gonna say bout my nails... all i wanna say is I DARE... I even went to work like this... my colleague were all numb shut bout this... so if u dun like my nails, at least tells mi tat i got 'balls' to do it...

(.-_-.)

Dreamsss

Been having alot of dreamsss these few days... and every of it is a bad dream... not a nitemare actually coz i dun jump out of my sleep having cold sweat... juz bad dream tat disturb my sleep... i think i do tok in my dreamsss... cant remember wat i had... only remembered tat some frends were in my dreamsss... did they come to my dreamland to scare mi... haha... i dunno... juz felt wierd... could it be my mind is at somewhere else so tats y there's a space for dreamsss to come in... wierd wierd wierd...

I'm Innocent!!!

How can u treat a frend like this... ur frend is innocent... ; ever got scolded out of nothing juz becoz ur frend is not in a good mood??? or shld i say pms??? mood swing??? how can a real frend to this... Personally i dun do tat to my frends which i cherish... even if i'm in a bad mood i'll juz sit down, shut myself & show a black face... i dun get piss off wif my frend when they did nothing to mi... THEY ARE INNOCENT!!! I cant tolerate ppl who do this to mi or they do to their frends... its so incorrigible...

r

Lousy shitty day... made a super big mistake today at work... shld say its a irreversible mistake... i deleted the important data of the user... luckily my colleague got magic power... help mi retrieve back the deleted data... mission impossible...

My mind was at somewhere else today or shld i say at someones' else... no mood to work at all especially after this big mistake... i pratically stopped work... juz daze around waited for time to go home... i shld stop missing someone already... it feels so terrible doing tat... makes my day so down... ya i shld... wat for i miss someone impossible... shld listen to wat Miss Eng says... "Bu Zhi De"... yap i've woken up... ain't not too late rite... and i've not played any high handed games... in fact i threw it away... ain't a game for mi to play... think i will not touch any in short time... guess i dun have wat it takes to be a bad boy afterall... non of those programmes is installed in mi... i'll juz be the Silly Little Kajuaz i used to be bah...

A boring and lonely weekend for little Kajuaz... but its a good weather tat Kajuaz like... rainy weather... Kajuaz favourite.... dark sky, big wind, heavy rain... wow... feels so nice... ya maybe becoz Kajuaz feels so lonely now... tats y he like this kind of weather... which describes his moods... maybe???

BTW Kajuaz has mutated... Is Kajuaz an X-Men??? Not Wolverine but Kajuazine haha...





Amazing isn't it... i had such long nails... ya i noe some say its disgusting... but i say its a miracle... how many can actually leave their nails so long without breaking it??? i need to work using my hands also... but of course i do take precaution as not to break my nails... And i'm gonna paint my nails... yeah... who dares to challenge mi...

Kajuaz miss her so much... any cure for missing someone???

Fucking Monday blues.... 1st i woke up late... still feeling very tired... while working my mind was floating at somewhere else... and juz as u tot its nothing, everything else juz come knocking on ur door... everything thing went wrong for mi at work today... those pc tat i work on all have problems... and its all new problems... i gotta seek from from my colleague to solve them... shit...

Today reach home late...lazing on the sofa watching tv and suddenly have this nostalgic feeling... thinking back tat now i'm in the working world le... no longer waking up in the morning going to sch for studies anymore... last time was worries for studies... but now is worry for future... i hate growing up... who can lend mi the time machine???

Look at Little Kajuaz at then................







and Little Kajuaz face was on the Esplanade pillar once...




and now this the the Little Kajuaz in reality





Time really flies.... cant imagine i'll get married, be a father, have my own hse, own car etc etc... so horrigible come to think of it...

Work is good... and little Kajuaz is good too... got along very well wif colleagues... now we are like frends working together... lots of laffter, shit stirring and tokking cock... going to work feels so relaxed... no stress, no pressure... glad i found this job... only bad thing is the money thingy.... haha.... juz hope to have more....

Sleep is good... Kajuaz is back to normal human sleeping time le... insonmia no more... having good nite sleep every nite... and wake up feeling fresh...


juz like this

I got a wishlist in my mind which i wanna fulfil it in few months time when i get my salary...

1. A diamond ring for myself
2. Command & Conquer Generals
3. Wolrld of Warcraft
4. LCD monitor
5. New motherboard ( com upgrade)
6. A small dvd player which support Divx
7. A new Nokia
8. Another half yr supply of contact lense

Lets juz see how many can i fulfil wif my meagre pay...

Lazy kajuaz stayed at home for the weekends... well nothing to do boring... luckily i got 4 cute ladies to acc mi... juz got the full series of Sex And The City... been following up wif them nowadays...

The week been quite busy... although work is easy and i alwiz finish work b4 4pm... but i still feel very tired everyday... Been a week since i worked... everything have been fine... learned everything in juz a short 3 days... now i can be on my own le... but guess i'll be looking for a nite job or i'll change for a better pay job...

Birthday is over... well... never quite celebrated it... only went for a good meal wif a few good frends... got a nice Domanchi shirt from Sharon & Summer, a box of great tasty chocolates from my cute little puppy Jaclyn, a pouch fron Serene... its nice of them to get mi a present... Thank U guys... really appreciated it...

Been bitching in a singapore forum call flowerpod nowadays... very infomative... all the basic A, B ,C of ppl and life... juz for the knowledge of myself only lah.... posted a thread on cold songs... not bad... got quite a few response... quite alot of recommendations on cold songs... really nice to listen to cold songs...

Wat a day i had... recieved an sms from Jingyong at noon asking wanna watch MI3... well i didnt plan to catch this movie... but ya its a sunday and i've been stuck at home for so many days le, so might as well go out for some fresh air ba... and bloody hell JY & Million choose Jurong Pt... WTF man... so far for mi... but well i still went in the end... lucky JY drives so at least i dun have to stand on the bloody train and squeeze wif ppl...Caught the 6.20pm show...

Here's wat i feel bout the show... 2 thumbs up man... though i'm not a MI fan nor crazy bout Mr Bruise... and i did not watch the previous 2 MI... so thumbs up is for the actions and technology... was real impressed by it...

Went off to visit Congo's son... coz the 2 bastards never went for his son 1st mths celebration... sat down tok cock, catch up, bitching around at a prata shop nearby...

Well really enjoy today's bitching session... been some time since we sat down and tok bout each other lan jiao wei... scolding each other all the vulgarities... haha... those were the days...

Happy Bitching!!!

Apparently silly Kajuaz have been sick for 2 days le... Having bad fever & throat inflamation... I cant even tok now... throat feels so painful even when swallowing saliva... and ya i did lost my voice coz of the thick phlgem stuck in my throat cant cough out... haizzz... real bad fever coming on and off for many times... feel so miserable now... and i didnt eat much these 2 days... only ate porridge.... kinda hungry now but no appetite... when will this fucking idiotic virus dies off... its killing mi le... i wanna eat good food on my bday one...

Ppl who strained their eyes reading this; I DID IT ON PURPOSE!!!

Oh yah... not forgeting to add more to my wishlist...

1. A webcam
2. Original Windows XP
3. Fragrant items tat can scent up my room

Where's my smile???

Been no good since i last update... Bad as in real bad, damn bad, never tat bad b4... I've been jobless for almost 3 mths le... No job, no money, no happiness, no life... Ain't tat juz bad enuff to kill urself... Now worse still tat my Bday is nearing... cant celebrate... anyway its nothing to celebrate actually... been celebrating for the past 5 yrs le... a bit bored bout it now... maybe shld do something new... how bout get 10 gers to rape mi??? maybe not enuff... how bout 20... haha... i'm so full of shit... crazy...

How bout mi telling u my crazy wishlist for this yr...

1. 20 gers to rape mi... haha
2. A good meal tat will make mi gain 10kg...
3. A job tat can give mi high salary... U hire mi???
4. A watch tat can last 10yrs
5. Command & Conquer Generals (original), Zero Hours expansion
6. A new Nokia
7. A decent pair of specs

Actually also not much lah... Juz some stupid ideas in my silly brain now...

Here's the Silly Kajuaz... after so long of m.i.a he's finally back here to blog...

A short update of him for those who are concern for him... Silly Kajuaz is now jobless... quitted his job b4 CNY juz becoz he dun like the place... haha... so now he is tending his very own mushroom farm... its getting bigger as days goes... haha... Full Of Shit rite... nvm bout this lame guy lah... juz pray hard for him to get a job soon... hopefully to his likings...
Other than this he is still the same old Kajuaz u noe... nothing has change...

FIRE!!! Dun ever play wif fire... its seems so nice to play wif... but when it gets out of control, its hell break loose...

So scared... Human are so scary... its so dofficult to survive in the outside world now... too much things i haven seen and been thru... i'm juz a bloody green horn... and only all the hypocrite ppl survive... they killed all the nice ppl out there... i'm being killed too... i had alot to learn... learn to be more 'jian' in order to survive...

I'm back 2 weeks ago le... juz plain lazy to update... busy working also...

I need a vacation... and i'm going now... well i wun be far but not near too... and for how longi'm away i also dunno... juz wanted alot of breathing space for myself... till my stress level is down then i'll be back... my hp will still be contactable... but i'll see who to reply... hp bill very the ex... already owing singtel alot now le... so till the next time i blog... i have vanished... poof........................................................................

And i purposely put this color to strain ur eyes... come bite mi lah!!!

Its been long since i last blog... but who cares... nobody bothers anyway... blogging at such a time might be strange for some ppl... but its a normal time for mi le... cant sleep anyway...

Well later i'll be heading back camp for the last time to collect my pink ic... finally i regain my freedom... well but i tink it isnt tat great anyway... so many have been thru this le... juz get pink ic only wat... wats the big deal??? The biggest deal for mi is i'll be transact into another stage of my life le... my working life...

I'm floating and lost now... 1st i cant survive without $$$, 2ndly the job i'm taking rite now doesnt pays mi yet, lastly the job tat i wanted haven reply mi yet... I'm now helping my frend in an event company doing shit job... actually doing events is one of my likings... but he wans mi to learn by clinching deals wif clients first; which is somethingi'm not good at... i'm not good in my words... it takes mi some 30 secs to twist my words around... and i dun really noe how to handle picky clients... this really got mi into high level of stress... watever lah... anyway in the meantime i'll be looking for a morning part time job first while waiting for police to reply mi... my fear is now if police side really dun reply mi, i'll really be floating in mid air le... i've asked myself wat else can i do??? no cert, no skills, no experience... wat kind of job can be a career for mi... i'm so damn now... I now really dunno wat the fuck will happen next...

I'm lonely too... dunno y this feeling comes to mi... when i started clearing my leave... i'm feeling so damn lonely... i have trouble can tell frends, yes i noe tat... but its cant be watever problem i have i share it wif my frends wat... everyone have their problems too... i too feel paiseh to bother them also... i need a girlfrend... someone whom i can share my problems wif, be with mi when i'm down... yes i noe this i gotta solve it myself... but the problem wif mi is i dunno how to go after a ger... i've tried... and falied... somehow i have phobia of this le... i'm so afraid of being rejected, being hurt... i hate tat... i'm tired too... it takes mi alot of courage to express my feelings to a ger... but wat i get in the end... alot of strength to wipe my tears and walk again... yes i'm now standing strong but i'm alone.... hopeless i can say to myself... force myself to put on a smile everyday... drink to numb my brains to stop thinking for the nite... (-_-)

When will you appear??? I need you!!!

I finally undertand some words which makes mi keep thinking for 4 yrs le... A few incidents and some ppl let mi realised it... yah i noe its kind of slow of mi... but at least now i unlock the mystery behind those words le...

I also learn to keep my care and concern more safely le... not going to give it to anyone anyhow... especially for those ppl who dun appreciate it and take it for granted...

Kajuaz gonna changed back to its oldself... the happy and cheerful kajuaz tat is so happy go lucky one... juz like my poly yrs... Many has told mi tat i've changed alot.. become more solemn le... Yah i realise it... i tok alot lesser, smile alot lesser... in fact has been frowning all the way... Probably i cared too much for others, make their problem mine... so tats y i got so many problems to handle... i cant take it therefore my temper becomes bad and shows black face... I really gotta apologise to those whom i shouted at b4... pls forgive mi... I really cant handle stress too well... once the stress is pressing on mi my temper will go up... so i will try to release stress by my temper... tats a fucking bad way to relieve stress but i juz did it... I really fucked myself up during tat period of time... A really fucked up person which everyone sees... Sorrie to my frends who tolerated my attitude at tat time... I noe many wont see this lah... but at least i realise my wrong le... Pls forgive mi...

A bit update on my life now... I'm clearing leave now for ord... coz i'm the PTP (did not pass ippt b4 going into army) batch, so will ord 3 weeks later than the BMT (passed ippt b4 going army) batch... the bmt batch will ord 22 sept and mi at 10 oct... And this fri i'll be having an ORD dinner at Furama... They make it so grand lor... and its $160 for 2 pax... meaning tat each of us gotta bring a partner down for this dinner... So i decided to bring Sharon along... my best buddy kaki whom i noe for 10yrs le... haha... juz hope the dinner turns out to be fun lah...

Tat all for my updates... not gonna sleep yet although its late lah... (.-_-.) bubbaizzz

This week many things happen around mi... think all these things happen for a reason.. to let mi realise my shortcomings..

1) I care too much bout my frends problems till its like my own.

2) I juz too kind hearted. Forgives ppl to easily. Ppl tends to take advantages of mi.

3) I'm too emotional. Anyone can juz spoil my day, the day will really sux till my temper is bad.

4) I'm too honest. Dun even noe how to say sweet lies to make ppl happy. ( I lose out when it comes to relationship)

5) I'm too enclosed to myself. Never speaks much bout my problems. Only a couple of ppl noes my problem.

6) I'm too timid when it comes to relationship. Dun dare to express myself to the ger in words and action. ( I totally lose out compared to other guys)

These are the few things i realise bout myself after so long... i noe its kind of late and slow... but at least i did... And there might be more tat i haven found out??

Whoever read this pls tell mi am i right bout these few problem i've have... and tell mi if i do have more which i dunno myself...

YEAH!!! I've finished my last live firing le... and its also the last excercise i'll be having le... everything is over...

Now i'm still in camp... coz i juz woke up from my very very peaceful sleep... came back camp last nite about 2am in the morning from live firing... then i slept till 1.30pm juz now... haha... yah i noe... i sleep alot... coz the nite b4 i did not sleep... was watching a HK serial... very nice show...

So now i can enjoy my leave le... the bad issue in camp finally been settled... no more shitty thing of going back camp for shit... haha... time sure flies now... can start to countdown the days le... anyway everything is resolved le...

Life is good... dun u agree... haha

NDP finally over... so no more of the sat rehearsal shit le... so nothing to look forward to also le... only waiting for days to pass and reach the day when i ord... wun be counting it coz the more u count the longer i wun come... so i'll juz sit back relax, enjoy my leave clearing and wait for the day to come... at this pt of time its actually quite fast thinking back to the day where i got in here and got my botak head... well... i'll only keep tat as memories of my life...

These few days stayed at home to rest... never go out... juz wanna stay home to rest myself... its kind of relax but bored lah... everyday is games, tv, online... haha... nothing meaningful happening in my life... am i wasting my time... well... i think so too... but theres nothing i can do to enrich my life right at this moment... maybe do some readings lor... haha...

Anyway my life has alwiz been a keepstill state... yes its low b4 this... but now its been to normal le lah... no more saddness and happiness... juz mi, myself and my life... Sometimes when i sees my frends enjoying their highs everyday i felt so envy of them... y cant i have tat too... could the problem be myself... yes i think so... i am the problem... coz i alwz keep to myself all the time... tats y only a few ppl got into my life, understand mi... is this normal??? hmm... i really dunno... but wat i noe tat this is the real zhenquan... no mask... no extra head & face... i like being myself... although it might not be appealing to others but who cares... i liked it... Someone actually said tat i shld go find a gf to change my chauvinist life... i guess she is rite... but i really dunno how to go bout it... coz its been like 23yrs of my life is lidat le... how to change??? yah i noe is can one... needs time... but i really need advice... i'm lost... LOST IN MY SOUL??? Somebody save mi!!!

Over the weekends i am so in love... haha... in love wif 4 gers... Carrie, Samantha, Miranda, Charlotte... haha... some may find these names familiar if u have watched 'Sex And The City'

Its really a very nice series... Shows the truth, clean, ugliness, crudeness of ppl... i find it very real... other than those sex scenes lah... i am more interested in the words they use lor... how crude it could get...

Well tats how i spent my boring weekend... wif 4 sexually deprived gers...

Life for mi has been calm... no highs or lows nowadays... i liked it this way... peaceful life... nothing to bother about...

Guess i've not been updating my blog nowadays ah... maybe juz plain laziness or silentness... juz wanna keep quiet and not tok bout my life...

Nowadays theres nothing much for mi to do in camp too... only ndp... but seems like its gonna end soon next week... after tat will be having my leave and wait for days to pass till ord le... Tok bout ord really makes mi stress le... dunno wat to do... first thing worry is $$$... after ord if i cant get a job by then i'll be rotting at home le... anyway to let u guys noe tat i've already sent an application for CNB officer in April... but seems like till now theres no news yet... not even a rejected letter... i've been hoping for the best to get in there... well so now i can only wait le lor... nothing much i could do now but start to look for lobangs for part time first... juz to keep myself busy after i ord and get $$$... Wish mi luck k... (-_-)

Tats all folks... Take good care...

Life has been quite peaceful after i recover from fever... peaceful as in not much troubles bothering mi le... it really feels so good to be peaceful...

This weekend stayed at home... never go out... very tired... now at home waiting for time to pass then gotta book in le... this week gonna be a easy week also... Hope my life will be peaceful from now on... and to all my frends: hope all of u are well and do take good care of urself...

Miserable Weekend

Still not well yet... stuck at home for the past 2 days... feeling very miserable... fever keeps coming back... then having a very bad throat imflammation, which will make me frown even when i swallow saliva... The last temperaturre was at midnite... really hope tats the last liao lah...cant take it anymore... juz wan a good well rest... and hope my throat gets better ba...

Today suppose to go Padang for NDP rehearsal one... haizzz... missed it... its so fun lor... although cant see much performance lah... but at least u get to see those "Sua Ku" singaporeans crowding around the barricades trying to see the performance although from their location is really cant see anything but they still wanna crowd there... The most shit part is when we gotta march pass Raffles City and Funan lah... All the ppl there like see circus animals parading the streets lidat... feels like a circus poddle man...

Yah i'm at home now... got 3 days mc... Was having high fever from yesterday... 38.7degrees... gonna die liao lah... now gonna rest liao... feeling drowsy le...

My Birthday pics uploaded... go to www.imagestation.com to view and get ur picz...
Userid: kajuaz
Pass: cockroach
gotta log in to my account coz i did not publicise my album....
so do keep this to urself...

The days juz sux!!! Wat is all this shit!!!

yeah i'm back home le... and i got back my internet connections too... paid it on sun... haha.. finally...
Juz got home not long ago... it sux today... hate army... full of shit... my life is already in shit liao and now more shit comes... wonder how long can i endure this... my weekend is already ruin... moodless whole day... and now even weekdays gotta be like this also... FUCK!!!

For those reading this muz be really scratching their heads lah...i need not explain anything... juz 3 words.. FULL OF SHIT...

Its been damn long since i last update again... this time is not i lazy lah... first my internet connection is being cut off for having a very big sum of outstanding balance... then i've been stuck in camp for 2 weekends... and now... i'm updating this in camp... believe it anot...

actually now can book out and go home liao... but gotta book in tonite again.. so i might juz as well stay in here to rest... and wats more i cant online at home mah...

juz a short update of my life... now i'm involve in NDP marching... so many weekends will be burn for rehearsal... rehearsal is shack man... under the hot sun... now my face is very tan plus i have a tan V neck on mi liao... haha... but wats nice is i get to wear NO.1 uniform lah... which is the white color one... so i'll be tied down wif this till NDP is over lah...

Really wonder anyone reading at my blog... although i admit i didn't update often lah... but i really no choice mah... only weekend can update... PONDERs???

Another week has past... juz got to noe this week tat my unit will get to march in NDP as Guard Of Honour... and i'm in it also... so alot of time will be spend in parade rehearsal... many weekends burns also... never care so much lah... juz wanna participate and wait for it to finish then will wait for ORD... next week will not be able to book out coz on standby... also good lah... can rest more in camp and not spend $$$...

Was very quiet last nite and today... juz dun feel like toking lah... juz wanna keep my mouth shut at times... shitty week... i juz realise i did not drop tears for very long liao... shld be more than 3 yrs liao lah... but someone made mi tear this week... felt really sad bout the incident... haizzz...

Birthday over

Haizz... here i am... 23 liao... haha... really had fun wif those frends celebrating wif mi... and thanx for all the pressie...

Well... not much of things to update lah... moods been good... i'm fine too... (^_^)
Juz wanna complain here tat i alwiz cant get to meet this frend lor... put aeroplane so many times... haha

I realise tat wat ppl say is right... Kajuaz really changed liao... really became more quiet... i dunno y i took such long time to realise this... watever it is i also dunno wat changes mi... and dunno y i change... as long as i not change to be bad can liao lah...

Birthday coming soon liao... 1 yr older liao... really scared... not scared of aging... but scared of responsibility... the older u get the more responsible u gotta get... haizzz... how i wish i can grow younger...

Wat have i done??

Ok... my birthday is almost here... yah... so a little reflect on my new yr resolution... wat have i done???
1) I've said i wanna tame myself... and yes i did... i've manage to tame myself alot liao...

2)I wanna clear the bad inflamation on my face... and yah... its really getting better liao... although not 100% done... guess i still need more time ba...

3)I wanna get some savings... and NO! i did not make it... still spend as much as i earn... haizzz... sad case... something else gotta be done lah...

4)I wanna change my pt of view to more optimisstic... and i done a bit lah... really can help it to have negative thinking lah... will try harder lah...

5)Last one... haizzz... shy to say lah.... i'm still smoking... haha... well i noe... there's ppl gonna scold mi liao... but.... aiyah... no buts lah...

its funny tt i actuali stil hold ur a/c.. n we dun seem 2 tok anymore.. whaha... anyway as usual.. dropped by 2 say.. keke.. tk care... *kyLie

Quite sad

Been quite some time since i update... not i lazy... juz tat there's not much things to blog... and i dun wan to blog some nonsense things...

Yesterday i was in camp doing my guard duty and was boring... then i remembered i met an old frend las Sunday... and she said i've changed... i was puzzled by the word 'changed'... coz i've been myself as alwiz mah... then she said i've become more quiet liao... not toking as much... and so i juz change my msn nick lor... i post the question on it asking whether i've become more quiet... and in less than 1 hr... 3 frends replied 'true' to mi...
(-_-) really meh... i myself did not realise tat i've become more quiet leh... and there's 2 frend who noe mi quite long but i haven been seeing them... usually only chat online... and they realise the change... wich really makes mi into thoughts liao...

Hello my frends

Was back on Tues liao... tried to update 3 times but then stupid server error and i never draft it... piss off... nvm tat...

Back to Taiwan... the last 3 days were great... went s few places wif guide... then at nite is own free time... can go anywhere we wan... and of coz i go to their nite market first lah... go try their food... some are nice lah... but some is maybe not to our s'porean tastebud lah... did went to visit their nitespots... quite fun... happening... but quite costly also lah... We only went to Kaohsiung .. and Kaohsiung is quite a small town lah... not really mush things there thou... think Taipei would be better...

Things back in S'pore are still the same... already adjusted back to the lifestyle and weather here... not a problem anymore... now will be relaxing back in camp liao... the last has past... so is waiting to pass time in camp and wait for ord...

Oh yah... i've uploaded the photos i took in Taiwan... www.imageststion.com userid: kajuaz pass: cockroach
u guys can juz go log in to have a look lah...

REGARDS

Just a short update... coz the weather now is very cold wif the strong wind blowing...

Training is over now... tomolo will be the last nite in this camp... then we'll move to Kaoshiung and stay in hotel... haha... good life hor... looking forward to this only... gotta take photos and enjoy... already got info of where to cheong liao... haha... then after this it means i'm coming home liao... haha... not too long liao... counting down................ ^_^

COLD

The cold front is over now... Weather quite alrite now...For the last few days when the cold front hits its really freaking cold till i shiver man... yah and i dun really brought warm clothings here to keep warm... my intension is to experience the cold weather for this month...But its quite cool now... Been here for quite many days liao... kinda used to the cold weather liao... actually i'm enjoying it man... haha...

My current location is at HengChun... bout 100+Km away from Khao Siung.. Its quite south of Taiwan so the weather is not as cold as Taipei... so its quite alrite lah... now wats in my mind is only R&R... then can see wats the lifestyle in Taiwan... already many ppl asking mi to buy things liao... i promise i will get something for everyone if possible... coz i also dunno wats in store for mi lor... cant satisfy everyone rite... think i'll get some Taiwanese food lah... let u guys get a taste of those wierd food stuff...

Alrite tats so much i gotta update u guys... will update if i got another chance to grab a place using the internet... Take good care everyone... I miss u guys... and i really miss home... ^_^

Off to Taiwan liao

Today i flying off to Taiwan liao... will be back by 29th again... tonite by 2359 gotta reach airport liao... kind of excited coz now temperature in Taiwan is quite low... gotta experience 1 month of coldness... haha...

I will miss alot of things and ppl here when i'm away... :( can i dun go??? haizzz... LL have to go... yah i will bring my camera over there to take pics... so can show it to u guys hows it like there...

Nothing much to update these few days although i'm at home from tues nite till now... either i'm at home stuck wif my PS2 if not i'm out drinking... no life rite... haizzz... but tatz juz the everyday life of a stupid kajuaz...

Swinging Mood

Its a long week in camp... Firstly valentine's day gotta be in camp... but luckily gets to go out in evening... so i meet up wif Irene... Had a long dinner wif her coz of the long queue... waited for 1 hr lidat b4 we got a seat... Dinner was good and had a good chat wif her bout my problems... and in the end also found out she had problems too... haha... a problematic valentine's day...

Fri nite did not book out... coz sat morning got ippt test... but i still ran out of camp and went RUSH... haha... party till 3 and went back camp to rest... morning was so bad... hate it so much when lack of sleep.... arrrgghhh... but still went on to take test lah... slept after tat till 2pm in camp waiting to book out... shack day...

Went back home and went for my annual dinner wif dao ni and shuting... a new yr dinner tat we muz have every yr... this is the 4th yr liao... next yr we'll still meet up again...

After dinner went over to Fernando's Bar for a drinking session wif Alan and Sharon... as usual we sang many duets... had lots of fun last nite... but the nite is still young... went on to Devil's... party till 4 b4 heading home... and now still feeling sleepy but dun wanna sleep coz the the stuffy and hot weather... haizzz... anyway gonna book in later liao lah... kind of sad but still i enjoyed my short weekend... (^_^)

End of fun

Haizzz... its th end of the long holiday... gotta book in camp later liao... didn't really enjoyed this new yr except for the part where i went to drink... continuous for 3 days man... haha... muz be outta my mind rite... coz i dun gamble lah... so nite time is so boring for mi one...

Last nite went over to Emi's hse for steamboat dinner and housewarming... she had her hse renovated... very nice... gave ppl a very zen feeling... saw many frends from TP also... everyone still the same... and ya saw this sec sch frend which lost contact for like 4yrs or so... when i saw her i was like 'is tat u??' tooo long never see her liao... played truant together, smoke, hang out together lah... etc etc... a typical those were the days fun... haha... updated each other for the lost 4 yrs... haha... Then we went down to Emi's frend pub... drink to our fill and sing like mad... enjoyed to the fullest...

Tomolo is Valentine's day liao... gotta be in camp... so sad... anyway wish everyone out there wif valentine, A very Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Happy Lunar New Year!!!

Yeah... its a new year again... meaning gonna be 1 yr older liao... oops!!! cannot say lidat... muz say gonna be smarter every new yr... haha...

I'm alone now... actually its not bad to be alone at this time... at least i can pass my time happily... So many wishes from frends as i online... Feels so good...

A new year, A new start.
Hope everyone will be happy for this Chicken year!!!

SICK

Back home from camp... feeling a bit sick liao... got symtoms of fever... sore throat and blocked nose... now can feel body temperature a bit warm and feeling cold liao... guess its coming ba... Haizzzz its been long since i fall sick ah... think the time has come again for another sickness... Think i gonna rest at home for this 2 days liao... cannot go out gai gai... sad sad...

Next weekend cannot book out... on standby... gotta wait till Tues nite then book out... by then my family already go back M'sia liao... haizzz... so i'll be alone in S'pore for CNY... Dunno where to go also... Anymore ppl who is alone during CNY??? Can jio mi out wor... hee hee...

LOOOONG WEEKEND!!!

Back from Genting last nite... was a real marvellous trip i enjoyed there...

Reached Genting bout 3.30pm... was quite late alreaady... so we rush to check in and go theme park for rides... we played only the most exciting ones and took fotos.. by the time was already evening liao... so we went for dinner... Went to a seafood restaraunt... the food not bad... so went on to shopping lor... lots of new shops open liao... so many things to buy... very cheap also... haha... but never buy much lah... bought 2 new clothes... its the girls tat shops more lah... 1 shop after anpther shop... guess if they got credit card hor... they would buy everything they see lor... by this time whole Genting is filled wif fog liao... visibility quite low... so we decided to have a feel of the free air-com... haha... damn cold lor... took a few pics wif the fog... the effects is like twilight zone... so nice... got some beer back to room... dunno drink till wat time then all drop and sleep... sleep till bout 8am then the gers wake up, wanna continue their shopping spree... but they had a hard time pulling the guys up... in the end drag till 10+ then went to shop... not much time thou... coz gotta check out at 12 noon...rushing for time they quickly went to buy the things they wan and headed back to room to pack up liao... this morning was raining quite heavily... lucky yesterday never rain ah... if not will miss alot of fun liao... if could stay 1 more day then it will be better... more time to shop and relax... went to grab our lunch... and its time to take the bus back liao... feels like the trip is a bit short but its really fun... haizzz... its a long journey back again... tried to rest during the trip but cant... reached sg bout 9.30pm lidat ba... had dinner and headed home... tiring... sleep till 2pm then woke up...

Haizzz... now only waiting for time to pass then go back camp for another long week of shit.... sickening....

Juz b4 i go

Its bout 3am now... haha... i'm still not asleep... so wat am i doing at such late hrs... no lah... actually i dun wanna sleep coz i leaving for Genting later at 7am... scared cant wake up lah... so might as well stay up whole nite...anyway the bus journey so long can sleep till shiok shiok mah...

Its been a long time since i went Genting liao... remember last time went wif adults was so boring... left mi and my cousin roaming around like lost child while they went casino for a kill or rather killed... this time i'm going on my own wif my campmates... all had agree no one will go casino coz tats not the plan for going there... our intend is to go there play play play and play... its a long weekend for us... yah its the best time to go for a chill out... guess this gonna be fun there... haha... but time is short for us... estimated time to reach there bout 1-2pm lidat... then we got a whole 24hrs to have fun b4 leaving... tat will make it like bout 8-9pm sat back in s'pore... when i got home then i will share bout the happenings there...

Till then... everyone who visited my pinkish blog... TAKE GOOD CARE... and keep those tag coming in... ^_^

WAH!!!

Really lost... dunno wat happen also... this week have been a very happening week for mi... ran out of camp on wed to go chiong... went Devil's... haha... then on fri after book out head down to Fisherman V for drink... yeaterday went to Rush... wah... real happening sia... a week of drinking session...

Anyway also alot of things in mind... problems unsolved then new problems came... maybe its i look for it one lah... dunno y also... feeling tat i'm juz a loser... slow in everything... indecisive... alwiz muz let things bypass mi then i will regret... haizzz.... tot this yr would be a better yr... but now its only the start and i've been facing so much bad things already... i'm not gonna go into details of wat shit i facing...

Hope for the better... Yah i'll be going to Genting on next Fri and Sat wif my campmates... going there for a chillout... looking forward to tat... gonna relax myself... ^_^

LIAR LIAR

Pack of lies... i hate liars... Y muz they lie... wats the big deal of telling the truth?? It wun kill rite... and i'm not tat unreasonable as to create a scene of out it rite... i simply dun understand... Really spoils the whole day... AAARRRGGGGHH... no mood to blog liao lah...

Yes!!! Its 31st Dec... Last day of 2004... So fast a yr has past... and only memories remainz... Guess this yr i shall set my new yr resolutions...

1) Tame myself. This yr i've been losing my cool all the time... Perhaps its stress or can say my temper is too hot... I'm gonna keep this away and be nice to ppl unless under hostile act...

2) To get my face off the horrible pimple inflamation. Friends who had seen mi this yr muz have realise my face condition been very bad... Dunno wat happened also... juz out of sudden 'boom' everything popped out...

3) Start my little own savings. Been in army for so long liao haven saved a bit b4... Although ppl say army boys no $ one... But i'm like getting so much more than others... Still can have savings... Shame on me...

4) To change my point of view of things. I've been thinking quite pessimistic at things lately... Alwiz looked on the bad side only... Will try to be more optimistic now... Look on the bright side...

5) This is the most difficult one for mi to succeed... To quit smoking... Been working towards this goal but eveytime fail... Its peer pressure and boredom tat lure mi... Seriously i need motivations to success in this lah... Who wans to be my motivator??

A great weekend indeed... Went to my god sis Bday on Sun... A real posh party indeed... Every guest wore formal clothings to attend it... Its such a grand scene... Had great fun throughout... And she had this lucky draw thingy and i got the 1st prize... Wow... a mp3 player leh... haha... lucky me... then got down to Checker's for a snack and chit chat session which last till 530... by this time all became stoned... haha...

Headed home but cant get to sleep... And i went online at 830 to book tix of Kung Fu Hustle... wanted so much to watch this show... Ask Irene to watch it wif mi... It was laffter all thru the show... Was impressed by the idea Stephen Chow has... Very brilliant ideas tat really makes every individual laff their heart out...

Now its 6pm liao... Gotta go pack my bag and get ready to jail myself again... haizzz... Gonna be out on the 31st again... Yah... then it'll be 2005 liao... Gotta think of my new yr resolutions liao... A change for the better in a new start of a yr... ^_^

Merry Christmas!!! Time really flies... its another yr of christmas already... Juz another 1 week time will be 2005... Sometimes i juz hope time can slow down... its juz going too fast already... Seeing frends in working world or almost to a degree... Really hate to grow up... Still like the times when u feel u are bigger than the world... nothing really bothers u at all... the fun times in sec sch and poly... haizzz... now its all past tense...

Went down to orchard last nite at first and ya... still so F*****G crowded... and wat i hated most are the 'Serangoon Roaders'... Arrgghh... juz hated seeing them in orchard trying to squezze here squezze there... Fed up of it... Decided to change a less crowd area so headed down Esplanade... Though many ppl too but still as cosy as ever... Sat there for a drink enjoying the cool breeze and waiting for 12am to come... Tot there will be fireworkz but haizzz... dun have... think its only on New Yrs Day countdown ba... Then met up wif some frends went over to Fernando's Bar... Really like tat place alot... Felt so frendly and welcome there... Had another drink, sing songs... Nite of happiness ends around 4am ba... Though i do not really have the mood but still i really enjoyed the compainionship of frends... SMILEZ KAJUAZ (.^_^.)

Hihi my dear frends... a bit long no update liao hor... haha the lazy worm keep crawling around mi lah...

Anyway the month has been bad lah... so much things to do in camp... cant even sleep well at nite... Sucky life... wanna ORD rite away...
Now at least can enjoy some leave... gonna relax myself and not to think of anything till i go back camp... ^_^

And i got my digicam liao... Panasonic Lumix FX-2... haha... but its quite a difficult procedure for mi to get it in hands... went to sim lim last sat to buy but so happen tat out of stock... so i told the salesger to reserved 1 for mi and i'll get it next week... and guess wat.... yesterday when i got to sim lim and the moment i step into the shop she called... saying tat the last piece is sold... Wat other sway things can u get??? Well i couldnt blame her also... she tried to find another piece for mi... and yes she got it... but its in the branch at Jurong Pt... AHHHH.... so ******* far lor... cant care so much lah... juz LL go down there to get it lah... Count it as my sway luck lah...

Oh yah... i got pix of my cute little hamster Mao Mao uploaded in Friendster... Take a look wor... so cute... hahaha...

Its been a down down down week for mi... tot things will be fine when i'm stuck in camp but... haizzz... juz never goes the way i wanted... Everythingy went wrong... The wrong thing alwiz happen at the correct wrong timing... juz cant explain y this can happen...

Luck has alwiz been down for mi... then now it went even more down... down to the lowest point where nothing can help to climb up again... Guess this year is not a good yr for mi...Hoping for the new year wif new fortunate happenings will shine on mi...

Well... so much for my down luck... juz reach home this morning wif only 1 hr of sleep... but u see now i am still awake down here right in front of my com blogging... guess i will not sleep also lah... next thing i gonna do will be stuck wif my PS2 playing games liao... My only little entertainment tat can keeps mi busy for the whole day without any problems or troubles hovering around mi...

Read all my frends blog juz now... realise tat my english really is bad... i dunno how to express myself in words... this is bad... meaning tat my frends cant even understand wat my problems are... any solutions to help??? haha...
tats all i can say now lah...

To all my frends: Take care! I really treasure all of u...

Ahhh.... last day of my long long weekend... its gonna end soon... and i realise tat during these 6 days of rest i haven got much rest... i've done nothing for myself... basically i've totally wasted the rest days... and also i've been drinking everynite except sat nite... haizzz... tats bad for mi...

Now dunno y i'm in such low mood... no mood to play game also... juz dunno wat to say liao lah... Hope in camp will be better... (>_<)

I'm very tired also.. nobody noes... i care so much wat i get in return??? Seriously i dunno... Maybe tats mi, i can sacrifice for them... But y am i doing this shit...Do i owe them a living??? I really wanna noe.. is god playing games wif mi??? Wans mi to suffer in silence??? Sometimes i juz kept quie coz it doesn't cost mi much... I still can manage thiese things... But thinking back, i've lost all the time i have for myself... Maybe i'm juz too dumb lah... Or maybe tats juz wat i am... No one i can blame, even god... Everytime i rather build the sadness on mi to fulfil others happiness...When is this gonna end??? I'm really sick of this... I do have my pwn happiness to pursue... Its juz tat she's not around in S'pore... How can i juz share my care and consern around lidat like nobody business...I really wonder myself y am i doing all this... Well maybe can say tat i'm stronger than others... But still there will be a time when one breaks down... I'm no superhero or watsoever... I'm juz a typical simple guy living in this ugly world... All i wanted is to find a stable relationship, settle down wif her... i'm juz sick of loving one after another... I wan a peaceful life... But y its juz doesn't happen to mi... Ever since i'm in love, my hearts been fluctuating between 2... Theres alwiz 2 ger around making my heart moves... Wat is going on???? Cant god juz grant my simple wish.... Sick Sick Sick.... Tired tired tired... Tats all in my mind now... I wonder if 1 day something bad happens to mi, will they come and show the care and concern back to mi??? I wonder... I really wonder....

Sick... I'm sick... maybe after a week of real hectic moments, my body decided to breakdown and fall sick to give it a rest... Running a low fever now... but still can feel the tiredness inside my body... Actually already had slight fever yesterday liao... but i juz keep quiet coz still had lots of work in hands not done... wat to do... juz suck it up and shut up lor...

This morning juz went for the stupid chemical defence training... yah lah i admit it was quite an experience but still find it stupid anyway... Juz forget it anyway...

Next week is gonna be a very very long week... weekend BURNED... haizzz... so shitty... but lucky got give us back a super long weekend... And i pray for peace the whole of next week... PEACE...

Well... guess i had nothing else to write anymore... Good nitezzz

Wow... finally i'm back from Thailand... B4 i went i wanna update but dunno wat happen to my blog tat makes mi unable to type..

It was quite a fruitful trip there to Thailand... The weather was rather hotter than here and only seen rain twice during the whole stay... The terrain of my training area was all flat plantation, so walking ia not a problem there except for the looong distance lah... The rather special thing is tat over at the plantation there are vendors selling fried rice, fried mee and drinks on van... and everyone name them ' ninja van '... Y this wierd name??? coz even b4 we can reach our rest area, they are already at there waiting for us... kind of strange ya... and its not once, its evcerytime... Amazing ain't it... but anyway the food does not taste so good afterall...
Sleeping in the field is the worst thing... there's not much mosquitoes, insect or watever but its the weather... the temperature was real low... I myself cant take it...

The canteen oer at Sai Yok Camp was good, many varities of food there, any many Thai gers... they can be as young as 14... These are really the kampung gers where they work hard... Never be surprise tat their English standard was good... Suddenly i miss Thailand so much....

A late boring sunday afternoon... y late??? coz i slept till 3pm then wake up... hahaha... dunno tat i can sleep so much... sleep till so shiok tat i wanted to sleep somemore... maybe last nite sleep very late ba... went to chinablack wif all my commandos... kind of regret it.. coz i dun like the music there... wat i wan is techno techno and more techno... haha... next time i wun go wif them anymore... i'll juz jio those tat likes techno to go MU wif mi... ^_6

looking at the time now... haizzzzz.... few more hrs to book in liao... SICK!!! alwiz hated this moment of time... next week then tell u guys more ba... Oh ya... i'll be leaving for Thailand on 4th Oct liao... will be back by 20th... not going there for holiday hor... going there to chiong... haha...

Yap yap... think nobody is seeing this but still i wanna update this blog... been so long since the last...
Haiz ita a dark monday, strange to see mi online on weekday??? Its an off day for mi... after this blog i gotta prepare to book in liao...

Let's see... wat shall i say... a little bit from army ba... I juz completed my 72Km route march at East Coast on 2nd Sept to 3rd... Lasted for bout 23hrs including break times... really shack mi out during the midnite hrs... but nevertheless i've done it... Finally i've complete the commandos training and got my red beret liao... ^_^

Nowadays during bookout i juz stay at home stuck to my PS2 and PC... its kind of fun staying home and nobody disturb u... Dunno wats wrong wif mi juz dun feels like going out... maybe coz pocket empty ba... Think now every weekend i will update this liao...

After so long i am finally back here ya... muz thanz to weiling who helped mi edit such a beautiful backdrop here... if not i wun be back here to post again...

Its a special day to see mi online at this time coz usually i'll be in camp growing my mushroom, but today i got MC, 3 days MC... Kajuaz weak lah... fever can shoot untill 39.6 and blackout... haizzz... lucky never become bbq kajuaz ah... well i will juz take these few days to rest ba... anyway now nothing to do in camp also...

Woke up early today coz last nite slept quite early... Went to Orchard Hello shop... wanted to get a new hp X430 but the promotion was over... again i missed another promotion... damn shitty man... its the second time i miss promotion... nvm lah... maybe next time ba... but next time will aim for other phone liao...

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything
To make them understand
Have you ever had someone
Steal your heart away
You'd give anything, oh
To make them feel the same
Have you ever search for words
To get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

Have you ever find someone
You dreamt of all your life
You'd do just about anything
To look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one
You've given your heart to
Only to find that one
Won't give their heart to you

Have you ever closed your eyes
And dreamt that they were there
And all you can do is wait
For the day when they will care
Have you ever loved somebody

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms, baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand
How I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
Cuz baby I can't sleep
Oh, Have you ever

Yeah i am back ppl... Actually last week already come back liao but juz too busy so never update... Also nothing much to update, coz i said i dun wanna tok bout my army life... Anyway juz let u guys noe tat i am fine in camp lor... although is kind of tough but i think i can go thru it lah... juz pray hard for mi lor...

Maybe when one day u guys see mi on the road u wun recgonise mi liao... haha... guess u all noes why rite...

Gonna stop here to start preparing to go back liao.... So take good care u ppl out there... MISS U ALL...

opps.. too latez le..
but if u hapen 2 c dis...
TAKE CARE worr... =)

Haizzz... bout 6hrs left b4 i go camp liao... so which means this is the last blog liao... hahaha...

Everyone plz wish mi luck and pray for mi... Thanx... Will miss alot of frends here...

Take good care everyone... (.^_^.)