WOOHOO

Look at this piece of beautiful art man... woohoo...

Do not doubt... this is little Kajuaz's hand... and the nails ain't fake... they are absoufuckinglutely nails tat grow out from my fingers... If u feel disgusted... pls leave and head to the toilet bowl, plant ur head in there and fucking puke ur intestine out... I dun give a fucking damn of wat ppl gonna say bout my nails... all i wanna say is I DARE... I even went to work like this... my colleague were all numb shut bout this... so if u dun like my nails, at least tells mi tat i got 'balls' to do it...

(.-_-.)

Dreamsss

Been having alot of dreamsss these few days... and every of it is a bad dream... not a nitemare actually coz i dun jump out of my sleep having cold sweat... juz bad dream tat disturb my sleep... i think i do tok in my dreamsss... cant remember wat i had... only remembered tat some frends were in my dreamsss... did they come to my dreamland to scare mi... haha... i dunno... juz felt wierd... could it be my mind is at somewhere else so tats y there's a space for dreamsss to come in... wierd wierd wierd...

I'm Innocent!!!

How can u treat a frend like this... ur frend is innocent... ; ever got scolded out of nothing juz becoz ur frend is not in a good mood??? or shld i say pms??? mood swing??? how can a real frend to this... Personally i dun do tat to my frends which i cherish... even if i'm in a bad mood i'll juz sit down, shut myself & show a black face... i dun get piss off wif my frend when they did nothing to mi... THEY ARE INNOCENT!!! I cant tolerate ppl who do this to mi or they do to their frends... its so incorrigible...

r

Lousy shitty day... made a super big mistake today at work... shld say its a irreversible mistake... i deleted the important data of the user... luckily my colleague got magic power... help mi retrieve back the deleted data... mission impossible...

My mind was at somewhere else today or shld i say at someones' else... no mood to work at all especially after this big mistake... i pratically stopped work... juz daze around waited for time to go home... i shld stop missing someone already... it feels so terrible doing tat... makes my day so down... ya i shld... wat for i miss someone impossible... shld listen to wat Miss Eng says... "Bu Zhi De"... yap i've woken up... ain't not too late rite... and i've not played any high handed games... in fact i threw it away... ain't a game for mi to play... think i will not touch any in short time... guess i dun have wat it takes to be a bad boy afterall... non of those programmes is installed in mi... i'll juz be the Silly Little Kajuaz i used to be bah...

A boring and lonely weekend for little Kajuaz... but its a good weather tat Kajuaz like... rainy weather... Kajuaz favourite.... dark sky, big wind, heavy rain... wow... feels so nice... ya maybe becoz Kajuaz feels so lonely now... tats y he like this kind of weather... which describes his moods... maybe???

BTW Kajuaz has mutated... Is Kajuaz an X-Men??? Not Wolverine but Kajuazine haha...





Amazing isn't it... i had such long nails... ya i noe some say its disgusting... but i say its a miracle... how many can actually leave their nails so long without breaking it??? i need to work using my hands also... but of course i do take precaution as not to break my nails... And i'm gonna paint my nails... yeah... who dares to challenge mi...

Kajuaz miss her so much... any cure for missing someone???

Fucking Monday blues.... 1st i woke up late... still feeling very tired... while working my mind was floating at somewhere else... and juz as u tot its nothing, everything else juz come knocking on ur door... everything thing went wrong for mi at work today... those pc tat i work on all have problems... and its all new problems... i gotta seek from from my colleague to solve them... shit...

Today reach home late...lazing on the sofa watching tv and suddenly have this nostalgic feeling... thinking back tat now i'm in the working world le... no longer waking up in the morning going to sch for studies anymore... last time was worries for studies... but now is worry for future... i hate growing up... who can lend mi the time machine???

Look at Little Kajuaz at then................







and Little Kajuaz face was on the Esplanade pillar once...




and now this the the Little Kajuaz in reality





Time really flies.... cant imagine i'll get married, be a father, have my own hse, own car etc etc... so horrigible come to think of it...

Work is good... and little Kajuaz is good too... got along very well wif colleagues... now we are like frends working together... lots of laffter, shit stirring and tokking cock... going to work feels so relaxed... no stress, no pressure... glad i found this job... only bad thing is the money thingy.... haha.... juz hope to have more....

Sleep is good... Kajuaz is back to normal human sleeping time le... insonmia no more... having good nite sleep every nite... and wake up feeling fresh...


juz like this

I got a wishlist in my mind which i wanna fulfil it in few months time when i get my salary...

1. A diamond ring for myself
2. Command & Conquer Generals
3. Wolrld of Warcraft
4. LCD monitor
5. New motherboard ( com upgrade)
6. A small dvd player which support Divx
7. A new Nokia
8. Another half yr supply of contact lense

Lets juz see how many can i fulfil wif my meagre pay...

Lazy kajuaz stayed at home for the weekends... well nothing to do boring... luckily i got 4 cute ladies to acc mi... juz got the full series of Sex And The City... been following up wif them nowadays...

The week been quite busy... although work is easy and i alwiz finish work b4 4pm... but i still feel very tired everyday... Been a week since i worked... everything have been fine... learned everything in juz a short 3 days... now i can be on my own le... but guess i'll be looking for a nite job or i'll change for a better pay job...

Birthday is over... well... never quite celebrated it... only went for a good meal wif a few good frends... got a nice Domanchi shirt from Sharon & Summer, a box of great tasty chocolates from my cute little puppy Jaclyn, a pouch fron Serene... its nice of them to get mi a present... Thank U guys... really appreciated it...

Been bitching in a singapore forum call flowerpod nowadays... very infomative... all the basic A, B ,C of ppl and life... juz for the knowledge of myself only lah.... posted a thread on cold songs... not bad... got quite a few response... quite alot of recommendations on cold songs... really nice to listen to cold songs...

Wat a day i had... recieved an sms from Jingyong at noon asking wanna watch MI3... well i didnt plan to catch this movie... but ya its a sunday and i've been stuck at home for so many days le, so might as well go out for some fresh air ba... and bloody hell JY & Million choose Jurong Pt... WTF man... so far for mi... but well i still went in the end... lucky JY drives so at least i dun have to stand on the bloody train and squeeze wif ppl...Caught the 6.20pm show...

Here's wat i feel bout the show... 2 thumbs up man... though i'm not a MI fan nor crazy bout Mr Bruise... and i did not watch the previous 2 MI... so thumbs up is for the actions and technology... was real impressed by it...

Went off to visit Congo's son... coz the 2 bastards never went for his son 1st mths celebration... sat down tok cock, catch up, bitching around at a prata shop nearby...

Well really enjoy today's bitching session... been some time since we sat down and tok bout each other lan jiao wei... scolding each other all the vulgarities... haha... those were the days...

Happy Bitching!!!

Apparently silly Kajuaz have been sick for 2 days le... Having bad fever & throat inflamation... I cant even tok now... throat feels so painful even when swallowing saliva... and ya i did lost my voice coz of the thick phlgem stuck in my throat cant cough out... haizzz... real bad fever coming on and off for many times... feel so miserable now... and i didnt eat much these 2 days... only ate porridge.... kinda hungry now but no appetite... when will this fucking idiotic virus dies off... its killing mi le... i wanna eat good food on my bday one...

Ppl who strained their eyes reading this; I DID IT ON PURPOSE!!!

Oh yah... not forgeting to add more to my wishlist...

1. A webcam
2. Original Windows XP
3. Fragrant items tat can scent up my room

Where's my smile???

Been no good since i last update... Bad as in real bad, damn bad, never tat bad b4... I've been jobless for almost 3 mths le... No job, no money, no happiness, no life... Ain't tat juz bad enuff to kill urself... Now worse still tat my Bday is nearing... cant celebrate... anyway its nothing to celebrate actually... been celebrating for the past 5 yrs le... a bit bored bout it now... maybe shld do something new... how bout get 10 gers to rape mi??? maybe not enuff... how bout 20... haha... i'm so full of shit... crazy...

How bout mi telling u my crazy wishlist for this yr...

1. 20 gers to rape mi... haha
2. A good meal tat will make mi gain 10kg...
3. A job tat can give mi high salary... U hire mi???
4. A watch tat can last 10yrs
5. Command & Conquer Generals (original), Zero Hours expansion
6. A new Nokia
7. A decent pair of specs

Actually also not much lah... Juz some stupid ideas in my silly brain now...

Here's the Silly Kajuaz... after so long of m.i.a he's finally back here to blog...

A short update of him for those who are concern for him... Silly Kajuaz is now jobless... quitted his job b4 CNY juz becoz he dun like the place... haha... so now he is tending his very own mushroom farm... its getting bigger as days goes... haha... Full Of Shit rite... nvm bout this lame guy lah... juz pray hard for him to get a job soon... hopefully to his likings...
Other than this he is still the same old Kajuaz u noe... nothing has change...

FIRE!!! Dun ever play wif fire... its seems so nice to play wif... but when it gets out of control, its hell break loose...

So scared... Human are so scary... its so dofficult to survive in the outside world now... too much things i haven seen and been thru... i'm juz a bloody green horn... and only all the hypocrite ppl survive... they killed all the nice ppl out there... i'm being killed too... i had alot to learn... learn to be more 'jian' in order to survive...

I'm back 2 weeks ago le... juz plain lazy to update... busy working also...

I need a vacation... and i'm going now... well i wun be far but not near too... and for how longi'm away i also dunno... juz wanted alot of breathing space for myself... till my stress level is down then i'll be back... my hp will still be contactable... but i'll see who to reply... hp bill very the ex... already owing singtel alot now le... so till the next time i blog... i have vanished... poof........................................................................

And i purposely put this color to strain ur eyes... come bite mi lah!!!

Its been long since i last blog... but who cares... nobody bothers anyway... blogging at such a time might be strange for some ppl... but its a normal time for mi le... cant sleep anyway...

Well later i'll be heading back camp for the last time to collect my pink ic... finally i regain my freedom... well but i tink it isnt tat great anyway... so many have been thru this le... juz get pink ic only wat... wats the big deal??? The biggest deal for mi is i'll be transact into another stage of my life le... my working life...

I'm floating and lost now... 1st i cant survive without $$$, 2ndly the job i'm taking rite now doesnt pays mi yet, lastly the job tat i wanted haven reply mi yet... I'm now helping my frend in an event company doing shit job... actually doing events is one of my likings... but he wans mi to learn by clinching deals wif clients first; which is somethingi'm not good at... i'm not good in my words... it takes mi some 30 secs to twist my words around... and i dun really noe how to handle picky clients... this really got mi into high level of stress... watever lah... anyway in the meantime i'll be looking for a morning part time job first while waiting for police to reply mi... my fear is now if police side really dun reply mi, i'll really be floating in mid air le... i've asked myself wat else can i do??? no cert, no skills, no experience... wat kind of job can be a career for mi... i'm so damn now... I now really dunno wat the fuck will happen next...

I'm lonely too... dunno y this feeling comes to mi... when i started clearing my leave... i'm feeling so damn lonely... i have trouble can tell frends, yes i noe tat... but its cant be watever problem i have i share it wif my frends wat... everyone have their problems too... i too feel paiseh to bother them also... i need a girlfrend... someone whom i can share my problems wif, be with mi when i'm down... yes i noe this i gotta solve it myself... but the problem wif mi is i dunno how to go after a ger... i've tried... and falied... somehow i have phobia of this le... i'm so afraid of being rejected, being hurt... i hate tat... i'm tired too... it takes mi alot of courage to express my feelings to a ger... but wat i get in the end... alot of strength to wipe my tears and walk again... yes i'm now standing strong but i'm alone.... hopeless i can say to myself... force myself to put on a smile everyday... drink to numb my brains to stop thinking for the nite... (-_-)

When will you appear??? I need you!!!

I finally undertand some words which makes mi keep thinking for 4 yrs le... A few incidents and some ppl let mi realised it... yah i noe its kind of slow of mi... but at least now i unlock the mystery behind those words le...

I also learn to keep my care and concern more safely le... not going to give it to anyone anyhow... especially for those ppl who dun appreciate it and take it for granted...

Kajuaz gonna changed back to its oldself... the happy and cheerful kajuaz tat is so happy go lucky one... juz like my poly yrs... Many has told mi tat i've changed alot.. become more solemn le... Yah i realise it... i tok alot lesser, smile alot lesser... in fact has been frowning all the way... Probably i cared too much for others, make their problem mine... so tats y i got so many problems to handle... i cant take it therefore my temper becomes bad and shows black face... I really gotta apologise to those whom i shouted at b4... pls forgive mi... I really cant handle stress too well... once the stress is pressing on mi my temper will go up... so i will try to release stress by my temper... tats a fucking bad way to relieve stress but i juz did it... I really fucked myself up during tat period of time... A really fucked up person which everyone sees... Sorrie to my frends who tolerated my attitude at tat time... I noe many wont see this lah... but at least i realise my wrong le... Pls forgive mi...

A bit update on my life now... I'm clearing leave now for ord... coz i'm the PTP (did not pass ippt b4 going into army) batch, so will ord 3 weeks later than the BMT (passed ippt b4 going army) batch... the bmt batch will ord 22 sept and mi at 10 oct... And this fri i'll be having an ORD dinner at Furama... They make it so grand lor... and its $160 for 2 pax... meaning tat each of us gotta bring a partner down for this dinner... So i decided to bring Sharon along... my best buddy kaki whom i noe for 10yrs le... haha... juz hope the dinner turns out to be fun lah...

Tat all for my updates... not gonna sleep yet although its late lah... (.-_-.) bubbaizzz

This week many things happen around mi... think all these things happen for a reason.. to let mi realise my shortcomings..

1) I care too much bout my frends problems till its like my own.

2) I juz too kind hearted. Forgives ppl to easily. Ppl tends to take advantages of mi.

3) I'm too emotional. Anyone can juz spoil my day, the day will really sux till my temper is bad.

4) I'm too honest. Dun even noe how to say sweet lies to make ppl happy. ( I lose out when it comes to relationship)

5) I'm too enclosed to myself. Never speaks much bout my problems. Only a couple of ppl noes my problem.

6) I'm too timid when it comes to relationship. Dun dare to express myself to the ger in words and action. ( I totally lose out compared to other guys)

These are the few things i realise bout myself after so long... i noe its kind of late and slow... but at least i did... And there might be more tat i haven found out??

Whoever read this pls tell mi am i right bout these few problem i've have... and tell mi if i do have more which i dunno myself...

YEAH!!! I've finished my last live firing le... and its also the last excercise i'll be having le... everything is over...

Now i'm still in camp... coz i juz woke up from my very very peaceful sleep... came back camp last nite about 2am in the morning from live firing... then i slept till 1.30pm juz now... haha... yah i noe... i sleep alot... coz the nite b4 i did not sleep... was watching a HK serial... very nice show...

So now i can enjoy my leave le... the bad issue in camp finally been settled... no more shitty thing of going back camp for shit... haha... time sure flies now... can start to countdown the days le... anyway everything is resolved le...

Life is good... dun u agree... haha

NDP finally over... so no more of the sat rehearsal shit le... so nothing to look forward to also le... only waiting for days to pass and reach the day when i ord... wun be counting it coz the more u count the longer i wun come... so i'll juz sit back relax, enjoy my leave clearing and wait for the day to come... at this pt of time its actually quite fast thinking back to the day where i got in here and got my botak head... well... i'll only keep tat as memories of my life...

These few days stayed at home to rest... never go out... juz wanna stay home to rest myself... its kind of relax but bored lah... everyday is games, tv, online... haha... nothing meaningful happening in my life... am i wasting my time... well... i think so too... but theres nothing i can do to enrich my life right at this moment... maybe do some readings lor... haha...

Anyway my life has alwiz been a keepstill state... yes its low b4 this... but now its been to normal le lah... no more saddness and happiness... juz mi, myself and my life... Sometimes when i sees my frends enjoying their highs everyday i felt so envy of them... y cant i have tat too... could the problem be myself... yes i think so... i am the problem... coz i alwz keep to myself all the time... tats y only a few ppl got into my life, understand mi... is this normal??? hmm... i really dunno... but wat i noe tat this is the real zhenquan... no mask... no extra head & face... i like being myself... although it might not be appealing to others but who cares... i liked it... Someone actually said tat i shld go find a gf to change my chauvinist life... i guess she is rite... but i really dunno how to go bout it... coz its been like 23yrs of my life is lidat le... how to change??? yah i noe is can one... needs time... but i really need advice... i'm lost... LOST IN MY SOUL??? Somebody save mi!!!